its 12:43 am and i cannot sleep. because my head is filled with thoughts and i can't stop thinking.
so its finally tomorrow. 23 hours and 17 min left until i can say the days over. desperately looking forward to that and then i can say 'i did it'. and if you don't know what im talking about just ignore that.
so i realised im probably the most stubborn person ever. who refuses to admit anything, even if i know somethings true I will deny it.
the truth does weird things to people. people can often anticipate and fret the moment their secrets are revealed but after the initial worry wears off it can be a relief. well the worry is still there so its not a relief...yet.
in a bit of a weird situation now and i don't know what to do. i know what i have to do but its not what i want. i'll do it anyways...so i can one day reach the finish line.
its funny how we lie to ourselves and trick ourselves into believing things that are untrue. its weird how we believe we have control when in reality we are letting something else take over our lives and we have no control.
its truly bizzare.
secrets, lies, truth...
maybe i'll write another post later when my thoughts actually make some sense. nite bye...!
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